Ch-ch-cha Changes!

There are people that resist change. Duh! My grandfather and father were a couple of them, then I married one who had one as his father! To be fair, change is difficult for these people because it represents an end to the status quo. When you are complacent, comfortable i.e. stagnant, change is hard. In my examples, once changes occurred, these men were and are fine. Funny thing, all of these men had huge across the ocean or across the country moves in their lives. Hmmm…..I think I'm on to something here. Could it be that their moves were so disruptive they never wanted change again? Calling Dr. Freud……

Image via CartoonStock.com

In design work, I meet up with loads of client's/client's family members that are resistant to change. I once had a client's spouse that claimed he would not would not give up his inexpensive, ratty recliner. He wanted it reupholstered or left the same. Ewwww….. I suppose reupholstery would have worked, but it would have been the price of a new updated version (that and my upholsterer would have fired me). We went shopping to the right places and bingo, problem solved. He was resistant because he had never put his bum into a proper sized or priced chair. I wonder sometimes if 25 years later he still has it but in his nursing home!

Recliner via Lanefurniture.com

Resistance to change can be a power play on the part of the person balking. Perhaps they are afraid of factors they think are out of their control. Are they comfortable with the budget that's been set? Can they not envision the whole room? Are they afraid of losing their identity in the design? Do they want to "punish" the offending spouse for suggesting change in the first place? All of these things can be overcome with open communication and really thinking through the reason behind the proposed changes.

Color board via thedistictivecottage.com

Compromise is the only way to work with resistance to change. I have met up with a few designers that feel it must be their way or the highway. No one should have that much control over your home. Including the naysayer. This is where a firm velvet covered foot can be very helpful from the person asking for change. (Look at last week's post on Self Esteem and Decorating). Listen to the objections carefully and you usually can get to the crux of the resistance, but make your own need for change heard. 

Happy couple via familytreecounseling.com

In my case, hopefully this has been done before I'm on the scene! Sigh….sometimes design work is close to giving therapy….. me know about your change horror stories and I'll share some more with you! Write below, all your comments are appreciated and welcomed. Hit the follow button too so we can stay in touch!